Be A Woman About It

Gone are the days of little Susie home maker. In a millennium when females are equal if not superior to their male counterparts, women have tapped into the strength they were born with to accomplish more than whatever could have been imagined.

They have made great strides in politics, law, medicine etc and in doing so enriched the quality of life for all mankind. That being said it simply amazes me the amount of bullshit that women allow themselves to get caught up in. 

The petty tirades, cat fights and unnecessary name calling does nothing to aid in our quest to find the cure for cancer or our overall benefit in whatever form it may come.

We are all guilty of indulging in it, I can readily admit that I have fallen victim to it as well. No one is asking you to be friends with someone your 'spirit' genuinely 'doesn't take to' or to go out of your way to be super nice to someone you may think is a total bitch. My suggestion is this, be cordial. Limit the ill mannered words because the same bitches you talk to about her will be the same ones to carry the news adding there own twist to an already unsavoury story.

If you feel so strongly about your feelings and your convictions approach the other person. The petty squabbles back and forth and side eye glances in public does no one any good especially when the murder rate is where it is with an eye opening realization that women have been stabbed, shot, robbed and left for dead as well. If your not 'ballsy' enough to approach them then keep your thoughts to yourself because people are coming up missing my dear and 2011 is not quite over.

The time you take to call a girl crazy you can take to fix or improve upon something in your own life.

The time you find to scrutinize someone's relationship is the time you could have taken to figure out why if you're so perfect your ass is still single.

The energy you take to figure out who is fucking who, is the energy you could use to figure out why no one is fucking you.

You get the gist of what I'm saying. 

Feel offended? Felt like this was aimed at you? Cool. Then there is probably something you need to work on.

No one is perfect so lets not pretend.

You have your 'clique'? That's cool to. Just remember how you secretly talk about them is how they secretly talk about you.

As women we need to rise above the pitfalls of this oppressive nature or history is doomed to keep repeating itself.

Take this with a grain of salt if you must, what you play forward is what you should expect to come back around a hundred fold.

Letter To Your Ex

So much for happy endings and the fairy-tales we've all dreamed about. Life never quite works itself out the way we planned.

Remember the days when you were a kid and life was so simple? Well those day are long gone and harsh reality sometimes sets in.

To ladies who saw beyond prom and had already begun planning their dream wedding and to guys who for all intents and purposes went along with playing house etc for whatever reason, nothing is the same any-more is it?

Life is a constant change and so it's no one's fault, or is it?
Who should the women who stayed by men thinking that they found forever but found heartache blame?

Who should the dudes that did right by their woman only to get stepped on and stepped over talk to?

Well hopefully no one starts talking to themselves that wouldn't be good.
If you've got the time or you get really angry one day write your ex letter (PLEASE GOD NEVER MAIL IT) purge yourself of any grudges or ill emotion you may have for that individual. You'll sleep a lot better. Need help, well here are some suggestions:


(LADIES)

Dear F*c*er,

ASS

I've been through with your

The hours, days and nights were never worth wtf you put me through. In all the fucks that I've had to give about you, you were never worth a single on of em. *chuckles* If I knew then what I knew now you wouldn't have been given the first fuck, but you live and you learn.
Stronger, wiser, more inept to my surroundings is what you've made me. The nights I caught your ass in Brooke's bakery while I was supposed to be waiting home on you.
I thought you should know that your head is whack and I stayed because I thought I loved you.
I heard your version of the story from a mutual friend and while I can't expect better of you I applaud your trifling ass for finally making some effort.
Do us all a favor and keep your "swag" to yourself.

Singed,
__________(Your name here)


(GUYS)

Dear What's Your Face,

How's it hanging? Nah I meant your pussy lips girl. You fed me this story about love and devotion but you steady was giving it to Joe.
The many times you said you were just friends with that politician who shall remain nameless was more than enough mud for me to be dragged through. But the mud his wife dragged you through when she came home and caught the two you provides solace for me you skeezing whore.

Trips and jewellery, fine dining and shit, pushing a nucca to commit when any dude could've hit!
Rap songs about your ass, studio time cut,
All for what I thought was for the love of some tired ass cunt.
Well I heard your road is really rocky now, your bills no longer paid,
Called your ass to cuss you out but BTC turned off your post-paid
Ain't that about a bitch
But Cash For Gold is real
Car payments have to make boo-boo
Drop it low girl, drop it drop it low girl
you know the deal

Singed,
_________(Your name here)

If writing it down makes you feel better (in cases where issues went unresolved) then by all means do that. Just be honest with yourself.
My suggestion to you is if  your letter resembles any of those words formed to make phrases and sentences up there then seeking counsel in a physcologist  or a physciatrist may not be such a bad idea. Clearly there are too many unresolved issues for you to handle alone.

No one thing is entirely your fault but take time to think, ask yourself if there weren't any warning signs that you were just too jaded to see. It takes two people to make a relationship work and if you never learned to live for you and realised ladies that nothing will "keep" him then sorry to say, you were bound to stub your toe.
Fellas you had no way of knowing is something that I highly doubt but  not beating her with someone else's stick (or for that fact beating her at all) is a feat within itself. However, if you met her a ho (you know: that night you and all your boys ran a train on her) then chances are shit just might not have worked itself out.
Ah well, you live and you learn.

Dust yourself off, take time to heal to avoid dragging baggage into the next relationship, and keep it one hundred.

Nothing will "keep" him

You cook, you clean, you sew and you give bj's without having to be asked! In your mind you are "the shit". In most cases you're probably right. You season chicken with the greatest that Kyle demands !...! You keep it tight and yet one day he ups and leaves you.
What did you do wrong? What didn't you do?

Ladies, have you ever really thought about it? Nothing will "keep" him.

Regardless of the cookie cut version of what he expressed many moons ago that you portray or have become for what you thought would be his undying love and devotion sweety Kyle still left.

You heard bitter women, happy women, confused women preach that you gotta live for you but you never heeded the advice they gave. The grain of salt you should have used to cipher through the bullshit, you used to cook ol boy's food, and where has that gotten you? Alone! That's where. Too many of these relationships and you'll soon be a bag lady.

Learn to live for you, when your life completely revolves around your significant other you're bound to be let down. Disappointments come, yes this is true but the human spirit is such a powerful and steadfast that it can bounce back; recover from what one would consider to be devastating experience to soar to heights previously thought to be unreachable. You're likely to be less devastated if you have/had other interests in short, a life!

Who cares if his favorite color is green! That doesn't mean every piece of panty and clothing you have should be green! This is where ol boy realizes you have the tendencies of a stalker and starts to distance himself.

Get your hair done when you want and how you want it because YOU LIKE IT!

Paint your nails colors you like because you like em! *sidenote: you shouldn't necessarily be with a man that pays THAT MUCH attention to the color of your nails to begin with.*

On occasion its more than appropriate to do things for your man, or things you know he likes but balance will be the savior of many-a-relationship and many-a-sanity.

People grow, people change (or at-least I hope they do) and their so does their temperament along with many other things. Your taste in clothes, music, food etc has evolved or changed completely from the time you were eating Gerber's baby food to now. I say that to say it's not always a change that we are aware of but it happens regardless.

As a woman you have to choose whether you're going to embrace those changes by trying to adjust accordingly (considering you'd want the same from your mate) or you're going to move on. Becoming clingy and changing who you are just to fit someones ideals should never be an option, because if no matter which route you choose, nothing will "keep" him.

I've seen women in the Bahamian society marry a man knowing his habits, his flaws, and his short comings and expect a miracle of a turn around the moment that man says I do. If this is what you're thinking you need to stop right there. When you marry someone, marry them knowing their flaws (or the ones they allow you to see) with the expectation that more trials, tribulations and good times are still to come and with the hope and belief that both of you have the faith and the strength to overcome whatever obstacles may present themselves to both of you.

If you do you and keep it 100 and dude still leaves then you should be more than assured that something better awaits.

Be prepared, be aware and be yourself because nothing will "keep" him.

Try

I believe in Jehovah Jireh

I believe in heaven, I believe in war

I believe a woman's temple

Gives her the right to choose but baby don't abort

I believe that marriage isn't

Between a man and woman but between love and love

And I believe you when you say you've lost all faith

But you most believe in something, something, something

You gotta believe in something, something, something

Lemme firstly say that I am far from a Frank Ocean fan, but when this cover was played for me it stirred me; made me want to listen and I as I listened the lyrics stood out. 

The song talks about beliefs and disbeliefs and most importantly trying.

I gather that he doesn't outright believe that humans are outright wicked, evil but that there is good in all of us and we have to try in order to allow the good to prevail.

That is easier said than done.

Someone pisses you off, isn't just easier to tell them off?

You found out this one chick talked mad trash about you, rather than confront her you do her the same service.

Your boy 'effed' that chick while you two were dating so you repay the favour.

Does any of those things display maturity, a level head or any type of understanding? No they don't.

We've all at one point or another become disillusioned. Remember having the greatest hopes or optimism for life?

Remember in church when the pastor made you believe God would smite you if you didn't pray before each meal. Or when you swore mom and dad would be together forever. Those were your beliefs.

Your faith was unshakeable, only Jesus himself could have told you otherwise, then as you grew you met this thing called reality and it set in. Your optimism faded and you became jaded. 

Its time to wipe the fish scales from your eyes, walk down that yellow brick road and restore your faith in humankind.

No one is perfect and we can all attest to that. We as humans fall short, we are fallible.

We however should try: 

Try to be better, do better, if the negativity comes so easily take a deep breath; a step back or just bite your tongue. Not every battle is worth going to war.

Don't be a floor mat for anybody but aim to be slow to anger, practice makes perfect.

I could sit here and preach all day but I surely do not live a perfect life, no one does.

All I'm suggesting is that we all try, make some sort of effort. 

What goes around comes around and if Richie Spice was right and the world is a circle then pay it forward and #playitforward and the world will be a much better place.

In the City: Get used to it

I couldn't sing to save my life, but I appreciate good music. I live on an island just bursting with talent and can appreciate when said talent is recognized. Now I couldn't tell you how to harmonize, make a beat, etc but I know I when like something after hearing, seeing or tasting it.

From the politically charged  

to the lyrics laced with the reality of today  

I appreciate the many forms that my Bahamian music can come in.

Whether the music came from a "Gorilla in Tims" 

or a soulful bird that would cause reflection and ultimately the calming of one's being for a period of time,

I love listening to them all. With all that said, how many of us can actually say we support our own? We buy the itunes songs or download the free mixtapes or go to the launch and send off parties that these talented individuals put together?

Being musically gifted in an island where music is a long way from the fore-front of the governments agenda is a blessing and a curse.These individuals will have to pave the way, cause clearly there is none, light up the darkness and shed light on  a collective group of islands that is clearly worth more than our sun sand and sea and offshore banking initiatives.

Whether they just wanna be  (popular) or they are in it for the long haul and for the love of it, they are talented.

To be able to be as versatile as some of these artists are in the land of rake and scrape is nothing short of amazing. No disrespect to those that express themselves through that avenue but in our technologically advanced era, this generation of singers, song writers, rappers, engineers, producers and beat makers have proven that they can indeed roll with the punches and evolve as the industry does.

So before you crank that soulja boy why not stunt on em hard swag and leave 

They say a prophet is never respected in his hometown well times are changing and so should our views of the gifted people we are blessed to come in contact with. 

Whether it be musically, visual art, sculpture etc. Like the old rake and scrape song says "Get involved, get involved" and play it forward so the next generations appreciation of our ever-evolving culture can be greater than ours!

Too precious to throw away

Rubbing your eyes in disbelief (like a real lifetime movie)

Some things are that hard to believe!

When you’ve been through so much, endured and had to constantly adjust letting your guard down is no easy task.

The past has taught you many lessons; most of which seem to have left a bitter after-taste in your mouth.

We have all been down this road but life is too short to let past experiences have a lasting negative effect on what can be a promising future.

You’d never really know unless you put yourself out there and try.

Never let a past relationship to cause you to miss out on future happiness.

We so often stand in our own way, never knowing the joys we may have experienced had we taken the chance; the risk that was set before us.

They joys of life are more felt when one remembers the pain endured.

A friend in L.A. was looking out there window and saw a white middle aged man walking along the side walk, seconds later this same guy walked into on-coming traffic in attempt to commit suicide. He obviously could no longer deal with the stresses of life.

As sickingly funny as it seemed to me at the time, I couldn’t comprehend what could be so bad that would make you want to take your own life. Luckily on-coming traffic avoided him and he only sustained injuries to his hand. Hopefully he gets the treatment he needs and can look forward to brighter tomorrows.

Take time and smell the roses, don’t hold the future accountable for the past.

 

When life gives you lemons, squeeze em and ciroc, stir and enjoy.

We’d never appreciate the sunshine if we didn’t experience the rainy days.

Like the weather, life constantly changes. Roll with the punches, allow the wounds to heal and enjoy every moment that you’re given. As long as there is breathe in your body there will be opportunity.

The stresses of life: bills, relationships, etc are fleeting and continuous. Plan but don’t stress over things you have no control over. You are but one being, one separate entity and although change starts with you moving a mountain is easier with someone else’s help.

Sometimes help is easier to receive than it seems but you’ll never know until you ask.

Take a chance, a gamble; because life in itself is a gamble, but never gamble more than you’re willing to lose...

Stop Right There

Breathe. Stretch. Shake. Let It Go.

You've FILLED IN THE BLANKS, realized WHEN YOU BEST WAS SIMPLY NOT GOOD ENOUGH,  tried some S&M to spice up your relationship and took some notes on  LIFE: WHAT'S YOUR GAME PLAN. Clearly you forgot that YOU ARE YOUR DRIVING FORCE and STOPPED MINDING YOUR OWN you let some  ATTENTION SEEKING WHORE'S (men with vagina's)sway you and deter you but STOP RIGHT THERE! it's time to get back on track!


TO THE CLEANERS with those pop-down, fall off twiggas. Keep it moving doll and www.dontcatchfeelings.weebly.com because IF IT'S MEANT TO BE it will be. DOMESTIC VIOLENCE does not equate love boo boo and there are too many fish in the sea for you to be THE OTHER WOMAN (OR MAN) take heed and avoid GOING FOR BROKE: JA RULE STYLE Keep KEEPING IT FRESH and step-step correct hunny! You are no longer a squirrel cause the world is too big for you to only want one nut! A man know's WHEN ENOUGH IS ENOUGH so you should to!

You keep making excuses: I need you to #STOPRIGHTTHERE

You believe those empty words: I need you to #STOPRIGHTTHERE

You steady hating for no reason: I need you to #STOPRIGHTTHERE

Tired of the bullshit - #SAYITWITHYOURCHEST

Tired of being mistreated, misled - #SAYITWITHYOURCHEST

Take action! (not the limbo dancer) Do something about it, speak up, make moves! If you didn't know ask Quelle (www.rappquelle.com), you need to get #ahead its 2011 and we are definitely up!

I have been blessed to meet so many talented people, whether its their play on words, their artistic abilities or just the very essence that is them and the reality is this; the world is getting smaller.
This means the slices of the pie you want are  getting smaller and will eventually diminish if you don't start (if you haven't already) chasing your dreams. Those goals, those ambitions you have/once had can still be attained with perseverance and hard wok! Burn the fuck outta that midnight oil, cry beg and plead if you have to! Nothing is as easy as it seems! Wait!!!!!!!!!!! Correction....most things aren't as easy as they seem!

The jungaliss got ambitions na lord Just ask Kedar (secret lover of jungaliss) so why don't you! With every fiber of your being chase your dreams and goals! If you have to start off small you do that! build up until you can do more. Take those baby steps crawl chile! Let your belly rub the floor til you can stand upright and strut with a pride and swagger that is all your own!

"Nothing comes easy it takes much practice..."- Nas said it best so STEP STEP in your  or  or your  or drag them  and make it happen!

Surround yourself with positive people, uplifting voices and people who will tell you the truth!

Keep it one hundred and expect the same from those around you.

Fair-weathered friends

You didn't want to believe it. You gave them the benefit of the doubt but time and time again they have proven themselves to be unworthy of your friendship-fair weathered friends.

They use your car and never put gas in it, borrow your clothes and never return them, put you in a position where you have to endure some unnecessary hardship, problems or concerns. Then they walk around with a sense of entitlement like the things you do as a friend is their birth right!
Before this becomes a tangent, let me say that life is gift and who you choose to share it with is your business. 

On that same token do not let someone walk over you, abuse and mistreat you, take advantage of you, with no reciprocity. If you choose to allow this then you have become the ass and they shall continue to ride you.

Balance can be a beautiful thing. I grew up in Anglican church where I was encouraged to believe in moderation. If you're going to consume alcohol-do it in moderation, going to take bullshit-take it in moderation but by now you've probably passed that point.

The funny thing is I always thought that life was unfair until recently. I had a conversation with someone who's views and opinions I can appreciate and you know what they told me, "life is fair, it's the people that aren't"....
Listen! When that sunk in I wanted to scream that truer words have never been spoken!!! The amount of wrong I have watched, read, heard that humans have done to each other is ridiculous!

Case and point: In high school my music teacher, he was a Jamaican and you'll soon see why that is important, told me to go online and search for those lottery's that grant you green cards. He said when it asked for your nationality to type in Jamaican so I did. Imagine my surprise when I did and it said something to the effect of unavailable, sorry, etc! Man I was like what people profiling based on nationality na!

Injustice is injustice no matter how you pretty that bitch up.
Those fair-weathered friends are doing you a great injustice but it's up to you to decide to continue to take it or to LET THEM GO! People only have the power you give them and it's time to cut the mother-fucking umbilical cord!
Tired of being frustrated? tired of the unnecessary stress? Take one of these and call me next week

You can only do so much, take so much no matter how much of a superhuman you think you are! 
Re-evaluate your friendships, who's been there through the good the bad and the ugly?!??!! If you real recognize real and their looking unfamiliar then cut that bitch/nigga/ bitch nigga loose! 
It was never convenient for you like it was for them. Cut your losses for you feel the need to cut a negro. What goes around comes around and it comes back ten times harder.
Just remember to be more selective, everyone deserves an unbiased chance, but don't be anyone's whipping boy....

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