Letter To Your Ex

So much for happy endings and the fairy-tales we've all dreamed about. Life never quite works itself out the way we planned.

Remember the days when you were a kid and life was so simple? Well those day are long gone and harsh reality sometimes sets in.

To ladies who saw beyond prom and had already begun planning their dream wedding and to guys who for all intents and purposes went along with playing house etc for whatever reason, nothing is the same any-more is it?

Life is a constant change and so it's no one's fault, or is it?
Who should the women who stayed by men thinking that they found forever but found heartache blame?

Who should the dudes that did right by their woman only to get stepped on and stepped over talk to?

Well hopefully no one starts talking to themselves that wouldn't be good.
If you've got the time or you get really angry one day write your ex letter (PLEASE GOD NEVER MAIL IT) purge yourself of any grudges or ill emotion you may have for that individual. You'll sleep a lot better. Need help, well here are some suggestions:


(LADIES)

Dear F*c*er,

ASS

I've been through with your

The hours, days and nights were never worth wtf you put me through. In all the fucks that I've had to give about you, you were never worth a single on of em. *chuckles* If I knew then what I knew now you wouldn't have been given the first fuck, but you live and you learn.
Stronger, wiser, more inept to my surroundings is what you've made me. The nights I caught your ass in Brooke's bakery while I was supposed to be waiting home on you.
I thought you should know that your head is whack and I stayed because I thought I loved you.
I heard your version of the story from a mutual friend and while I can't expect better of you I applaud your trifling ass for finally making some effort.
Do us all a favor and keep your "swag" to yourself.

Singed,
__________(Your name here)


(GUYS)

Dear What's Your Face,

How's it hanging? Nah I meant your pussy lips girl. You fed me this story about love and devotion but you steady was giving it to Joe.
The many times you said you were just friends with that politician who shall remain nameless was more than enough mud for me to be dragged through. But the mud his wife dragged you through when she came home and caught the two you provides solace for me you skeezing whore.

Trips and jewellery, fine dining and shit, pushing a nucca to commit when any dude could've hit!
Rap songs about your ass, studio time cut,
All for what I thought was for the love of some tired ass cunt.
Well I heard your road is really rocky now, your bills no longer paid,
Called your ass to cuss you out but BTC turned off your post-paid
Ain't that about a bitch
But Cash For Gold is real
Car payments have to make boo-boo
Drop it low girl, drop it drop it low girl
you know the deal

Singed,
_________(Your name here)

If writing it down makes you feel better (in cases where issues went unresolved) then by all means do that. Just be honest with yourself.
My suggestion to you is if  your letter resembles any of those words formed to make phrases and sentences up there then seeking counsel in a physcologist  or a physciatrist may not be such a bad idea. Clearly there are too many unresolved issues for you to handle alone.

No one thing is entirely your fault but take time to think, ask yourself if there weren't any warning signs that you were just too jaded to see. It takes two people to make a relationship work and if you never learned to live for you and realised ladies that nothing will "keep" him then sorry to say, you were bound to stub your toe.
Fellas you had no way of knowing is something that I highly doubt but  not beating her with someone else's stick (or for that fact beating her at all) is a feat within itself. However, if you met her a ho (you know: that night you and all your boys ran a train on her) then chances are shit just might not have worked itself out.
Ah well, you live and you learn.

Dust yourself off, take time to heal to avoid dragging baggage into the next relationship, and keep it one hundred.

Nothing will "keep" him

You cook, you clean, you sew and you give bj's without having to be asked! In your mind you are "the shit". In most cases you're probably right. You season chicken with the greatest that Kyle demands !...! You keep it tight and yet one day he ups and leaves you.
What did you do wrong? What didn't you do?

Ladies, have you ever really thought about it? Nothing will "keep" him.

Regardless of the cookie cut version of what he expressed many moons ago that you portray or have become for what you thought would be his undying love and devotion sweety Kyle still left.

You heard bitter women, happy women, confused women preach that you gotta live for you but you never heeded the advice they gave. The grain of salt you should have used to cipher through the bullshit, you used to cook ol boy's food, and where has that gotten you? Alone! That's where. Too many of these relationships and you'll soon be a bag lady.

Learn to live for you, when your life completely revolves around your significant other you're bound to be let down. Disappointments come, yes this is true but the human spirit is such a powerful and steadfast that it can bounce back; recover from what one would consider to be devastating experience to soar to heights previously thought to be unreachable. You're likely to be less devastated if you have/had other interests in short, a life!

Who cares if his favorite color is green! That doesn't mean every piece of panty and clothing you have should be green! This is where ol boy realizes you have the tendencies of a stalker and starts to distance himself.

Get your hair done when you want and how you want it because YOU LIKE IT!

Paint your nails colors you like because you like em! *sidenote: you shouldn't necessarily be with a man that pays THAT MUCH attention to the color of your nails to begin with.*

On occasion its more than appropriate to do things for your man, or things you know he likes but balance will be the savior of many-a-relationship and many-a-sanity.

People grow, people change (or at-least I hope they do) and their so does their temperament along with many other things. Your taste in clothes, music, food etc has evolved or changed completely from the time you were eating Gerber's baby food to now. I say that to say it's not always a change that we are aware of but it happens regardless.

As a woman you have to choose whether you're going to embrace those changes by trying to adjust accordingly (considering you'd want the same from your mate) or you're going to move on. Becoming clingy and changing who you are just to fit someones ideals should never be an option, because if no matter which route you choose, nothing will "keep" him.

I've seen women in the Bahamian society marry a man knowing his habits, his flaws, and his short comings and expect a miracle of a turn around the moment that man says I do. If this is what you're thinking you need to stop right there. When you marry someone, marry them knowing their flaws (or the ones they allow you to see) with the expectation that more trials, tribulations and good times are still to come and with the hope and belief that both of you have the faith and the strength to overcome whatever obstacles may present themselves to both of you.

If you do you and keep it 100 and dude still leaves then you should be more than assured that something better awaits.

Be prepared, be aware and be yourself because nothing will "keep" him.

Try

I believe in Jehovah Jireh

I believe in heaven, I believe in war

I believe a woman's temple

Gives her the right to choose but baby don't abort

I believe that marriage isn't

Between a man and woman but between love and love

And I believe you when you say you've lost all faith

But you most believe in something, something, something

You gotta believe in something, something, something

Lemme firstly say that I am far from a Frank Ocean fan, but when this cover was played for me it stirred me; made me want to listen and I as I listened the lyrics stood out. 

The song talks about beliefs and disbeliefs and most importantly trying.

I gather that he doesn't outright believe that humans are outright wicked, evil but that there is good in all of us and we have to try in order to allow the good to prevail.

That is easier said than done.

Someone pisses you off, isn't just easier to tell them off?

You found out this one chick talked mad trash about you, rather than confront her you do her the same service.

Your boy 'effed' that chick while you two were dating so you repay the favour.

Does any of those things display maturity, a level head or any type of understanding? No they don't.

We've all at one point or another become disillusioned. Remember having the greatest hopes or optimism for life?

Remember in church when the pastor made you believe God would smite you if you didn't pray before each meal. Or when you swore mom and dad would be together forever. Those were your beliefs.

Your faith was unshakeable, only Jesus himself could have told you otherwise, then as you grew you met this thing called reality and it set in. Your optimism faded and you became jaded. 

Its time to wipe the fish scales from your eyes, walk down that yellow brick road and restore your faith in humankind.

No one is perfect and we can all attest to that. We as humans fall short, we are fallible.

We however should try: 

Try to be better, do better, if the negativity comes so easily take a deep breath; a step back or just bite your tongue. Not every battle is worth going to war.

Don't be a floor mat for anybody but aim to be slow to anger, practice makes perfect.

I could sit here and preach all day but I surely do not live a perfect life, no one does.

All I'm suggesting is that we all try, make some sort of effort. 

What goes around comes around and if Richie Spice was right and the world is a circle then pay it forward and #playitforward and the world will be a much better place.

In the City: Get used to it

I couldn't sing to save my life, but I appreciate good music. I live on an island just bursting with talent and can appreciate when said talent is recognized. Now I couldn't tell you how to harmonize, make a beat, etc but I know I when like something after hearing, seeing or tasting it.

From the politically charged  

to the lyrics laced with the reality of today  

I appreciate the many forms that my Bahamian music can come in.

Whether the music came from a "Gorilla in Tims" 

or a soulful bird that would cause reflection and ultimately the calming of one's being for a period of time,

I love listening to them all. With all that said, how many of us can actually say we support our own? We buy the itunes songs or download the free mixtapes or go to the launch and send off parties that these talented individuals put together?

Being musically gifted in an island where music is a long way from the fore-front of the governments agenda is a blessing and a curse.These individuals will have to pave the way, cause clearly there is none, light up the darkness and shed light on  a collective group of islands that is clearly worth more than our sun sand and sea and offshore banking initiatives.

Whether they just wanna be  (popular) or they are in it for the long haul and for the love of it, they are talented.

To be able to be as versatile as some of these artists are in the land of rake and scrape is nothing short of amazing. No disrespect to those that express themselves through that avenue but in our technologically advanced era, this generation of singers, song writers, rappers, engineers, producers and beat makers have proven that they can indeed roll with the punches and evolve as the industry does.

So before you crank that soulja boy why not stunt on em hard swag and leave 

They say a prophet is never respected in his hometown well times are changing and so should our views of the gifted people we are blessed to come in contact with. 

Whether it be musically, visual art, sculpture etc. Like the old rake and scrape song says "Get involved, get involved" and play it forward so the next generations appreciation of our ever-evolving culture can be greater than ours!